A Cry for Forgiveness!

Many of us struggle with forgiveness. Do I have to forgive someone who continues to let me down? Must I forgive someone who takes advantage of me? Do I have to forgive one who doesn’t ask for it? Forgiveness seems like a novel idea until you are the one who has to do it. Perhaps nowhere is our questions concerning forgiveness answered more clearly than at the cross.

Jesus approached the topic of forgiveness on many occasions during His earthly ministry.
“For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your heavenly Father will not forgive your transgressions” (Matt. 6:14 & 15).

In Matthew 18:21 & 22, Peter asks the question, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus answers, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven."

In Mark 11:25 & 26 it reads, “Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father who is in heaven will also forgive your transgressions. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your transgressions.”

Luke 6:37 states, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned.”

In Luke 11, verse 4, as part of The Model Prayer, Jesus tells His disciples they should pray, “And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves also forgive everyone who is indebted to us.”

FORGIVENESS IS COMMANDED! Jesus stated, in no uncertain terms, that “if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” This means that an ongoing relationship with God becomes severely strained when we refuse to extend forgiveness to those who have inflicted harm. People cannot be tightly connected with God, experience His favor or have an optimal relationship with Him and at the same time be stubbornly unforgiving toward others. When we do so, we are trivializing the suffering that Jesus went through to extend forgiveness to us.

WE SHOULD FORGIVE BECAUSE OUR HEAVENLY FATHER HAS FORGIVEN US. Forgiveness hinges on our ability to see ourselves and other people from God’s perspective. All of us have received what we didn’t deserve. Someone died for you. Someone gave their life as an atoning sacrifice so that you could have forgiveness. And there is nothing that anyone has or could ever do to us that would exceed what we have done to God. Any wrong that has been perpetrated against us could never compare to what Jesus went through to extend forgiveness to us.

We must show mercy as we have been shown mercy. And if we refuse to do so, our Heavenly Father will not grant us forgiveness. If our master can forgive the astronomical debt we owe Him, then certainly we can forgive others the paltry debt they owe us. Because nothing we have to forgive can even faintly or remotely compare with what we have been forgiven of. When man had done his worst, Jesus prayed, not for justice, but for mercy. He pleaded that His enemies would be absolved of their evil actions when He cried out, "Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing" (Lk. 23:34). And He prayed this, not after His wounds had healed and after He had time to get over it, look back and reflect. No, He prayed this while His wounds were still open.

SO OFTEN IT’S NOT FORGIVENESS WE OFFER, BUT REVENGE WE SEEK. Do we have enough faith to leave justice in the hands of God? Hebrews 10:30 states, “‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay.’ And again, ‘The Lord will judge His people.’ It is a terrifying thing to fall into the hands of the living God.”
Romans 12:19ff reads, “Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord. But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not overcome evil with evil, but overcome evil with good” (Rom. 12:19-21). We tend to view forgiveness is a show of weakness. Forgiveness means we’re condoning the perpetrator’s actions. We believe that the perpetrator should suffer for a while.

On the cross we see Jesus void of pride. As the nails were being driven through His body, when the pain was fiercest, when the jolts of anguish were the sharpest; He prayed! When His nerves were the most tender and the agony most unimaginable; He prayed for the criminals. How could He do such a thing? Because Jesus was about the Father’s business. Remember His prayer in the garden—“Yet not as I will, but as you will?” Jesus still called God “Father” while being treated unjustly. Jesus had confidence in the Father. In His darkest moment, Jesus was nailed to a cross but He clung to the Father. Jesus had the power to come down from the cross and wipe all His persecutors from the face of the earth. But on the cross we see a Man who showed incredible restraint, choosing forgiveness instead of revenge; all because He deferred to the Father. Do we have enough faith to leave justice in the hands of our heavenly Father? Can we say “Father” when we are being crucified?

FORGIVENESS DOESN’T MEAN THE DISMISSAL OF WRONGDOING. In Luke 17:3 it reads, “If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.” The two imperatives, “rebuke” and “forgive,” are conditional. I may not rebuke my brother for a sin he has not committed; nor may I forgive him of a sin which he refuses to repent of. While we are to cultivate a forgiving attitude, we are not at liberty to simply dismiss a brother’s evil, thus freeing him from his obligation to get things right with God. The transgressor must still be held accountable for his reprehensible conduct. We can forgive the one who sins against us, but we cannot bring about the ultimate absolution of sin before God. It’s important that we let a brother who has sinned against when they have sinned in the sight of God as well.

FORGIVENESS IS MORE OF AN ATTITUDE THAN AN ACT. Just prior to Jesus’ telling of The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant, Peter asks the question, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Peter thought he was being generous; he probably thought he was really going to impress Jesus by suggesting that he should forgive a brother 7 times. The Pharisees only required a person to forgive 3 times. But Jesus responds by telling Peter not to even stop at 7; the number He uses is 70 times 7, but we mustn’t take this to mean a literal 490 times lest we miss the point. Peter understood that when a person sins against another and repents, he must be forgiven, but Peter must have been astonished when Jesus said that you must forgive your brother 70 times 7. What Jesus was saying was that as long as a man is sincere in repenting, one must continue to forgive him. There is no limit. One is to forgive as often as his brother repents because this is the way God does it.

But what about the one who never seeks forgiveness from me? Do I still have to forgive him? The answer is still, “Yes!” There are some who would say, “I don’t have to forgive if the one who has wronged me doesn’t ask for forgiveness.” But that’s a selfish way of thinking. It’s a prideful statement as well. Jesus prayed for His enemies from the cross! An attitude of forgiveness is about what you need to do in order to be like Christ. It is true that you cannot control the actions of other human beings. You can only control yourself; therefore, in order to be Christ-like, you must do what it takes to rid your heart of bitterness, anger and hatred because such things can ruin us spiritually. Paul writes in Ephesians 4:31, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.” How do you put away all bitterness and wrath and anger? Well, one definite way to do so is through a heart of forgiveness. Your willingness to let go of an offense through a heart of forgiveness does not absolve the guilty party. They should still seek forgiveness, but you cannot control what they do. All you can do is make certain that you are living Christ-like.

If Jesus had come down from the cross, His prayer could not have been answered. In other words, Jesus went as far as humanly possible to see to it that His persecutors could have forgiveness. He didn’t just die for the good people. He died for the criminals; the very people who mocked Him, ridiculed Him, spit in His face, tortured and crucified Him. Let us think about that the next time we personally contemplate forgiveness.